September 19, 2021 AM
| Feeling: Exhausted |
Working: New V. of website |
Listening: Lofi Girl and Rain |
| Playing: N/A |
Watching: N/A |
Weather: Mostly Clear |
I expected to be back and working on this place before three months- alas, here we are. The breakup really took it's toll on me.
I'm at a funny place emotionally and I don't think I'm quite ready to talk about it-- or maybe just not on the front page of my website.
I was finally properly diagnosed and we now know why I've been fainting so often and why I cannot walk. I have something called "Conversion Disorder".
It's good news, though. It's treatable and people have recovered and go back to a normal functioning life. I'm currently taking new meds (that make it hard to make art, work on my website or play games- I'm best a bump on a log staring at the wall) and the fainting has finally stopped. I'm elated. The next step is to be able to take care of myself a bit better and eventually walk with the help of physical therapy.
We're still working out the meds. I had hoped this would all be a quick thing that just happens and then I need to get it in my system but apparently we have to find the right one first.
I'm also in stress management classes as stress is apparently what caused this whole thing. I'm told it's directly linked to my PTSD.
I've been trying to focus on working on projects to manage my stress. But when I can't work on anything here because I'm too brain-dead I just lay in bed playing solitaire on my phone all day until Webtoon updates and I can read my comics.
My goal here is to recreate all my pages from my old layout and add more. But because so many people like my old layout I intend to leave it up. I don't think I'll have the capacity to keep both websites updated at the same time but I guess we'll see. (Very doubtful)
I also have plans to integrate an art and photo gallery but that's a bit down the line.
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